I saw this slide show on my MSN homepage today. It sort of caught my attention because I’m just a tad bit spastic when it comes to germs and bacteria and all that fun stuff. I haven’t always been this bad. You’d think that when my kids came along I might have let a few things slide because you know, nothing says I love you sweetie like a mom who won’t share a water bottle for fear of lingering backwash. Yeah, um, it seems my kids only served to intensify my OCD tendencies though. Something about my toddler’s inclination to scavenge and scarf down random food particles left over from meals past gets under my skin.
I guess I never noticed before how nasty stuff was. The gas pump, for instance. Ick. Cold hard cash. Do you have any idea how many grubby hands that ten spot has passed through? Hotel rooms. Doctors offices. Gymnastics facilities. Chuck E. Cheeses. Oh the list goes on and on. I’m beginning to worry myself though because I’ve started to hold my library books by the corners. Seriously. Library books. You may not have considered this before but think about it. I read in bed from time to time. And in so doing I’m transferring all of those germs from the pages of my chick lit to my 400 thread count Luxury Sateen bed linens. The thought of it makes you just want to strip down and crawl right under those covers doesn’t it?
Ah. But those irrational fears have been displaced. Now that I’ve seen the slide show, I know that there are far greater threats out there just waiting for a clean body on which to pounce.
Number 8, the lemon wedge, totally caught me off guard. Apparently I’ve squeezed my last drop of refreshing citrus juice into that tall glass of Cracker Barrel sweet tea. Oh. And get this. You know how you thought that the fine downy feathers in your pillow were tickling your nose at night and making you sneeze? Nah. More likely than not it’s the corpses and fecal matter of the dust mites in your bed. And yes, I knew my bed had dust mites. I just chose not to acknowledge them. That will be much harder to do now thankyouverymuch.
I just love finding fun stuff like that on the great big internet. And I thought I’d share.
Anybody want to go in with me on a case of Purell?
