Okay so last week on Works For Me Wednesday I posted a list of ten things that totally work for me. As I was writing that post I started thinking about things that would work for me, that is of course, if they existed. So I made a list of those too. In spite of the fact that they don’t exist, and likely never will. You can’t stop a girl from dreamin’ right?
1. You know how the post office has that forever stamp? Well, I wish there had been forever gas back in 1995.
2. Or forever groceries in 1945.
3. Better yet. My forever 25 body.
4. Teleportation. I could so do without airplane travel. Or the long road trips with bickering kids in the backseat.
5. And speaking of bickering kids in the backseat, Jeff and I frequently wish that our minivan had one of those windows like they have in limos. What I wouldn’t give for a little switch that erected a sound proof barrier between the front and back seats.
6. A little laundry fairy who fluttered in once a week and saw the whole process through from start to finish.
7. An update on Rob and Amber of Survivor fame. We love them. I’m fairly certain most of America hates them but we LOVE them, even more so after they did the Amazing Race. If Jeff and I ever get chosen to be on that show we’d be the next Rob and Amber. Sneaky little devils weren’t they? We’d so be them.
8. A switch operated mattress zapper. What, you may be asking yourself, on Earth is a switch operated mattress zapper? Well, duh, it doesn’t exist remember? If it did though, I would have a handy dandy little switch in the kitchen and when I flipped it my not-so-morning-friendly teenage daughter would feel an invigorating little zip run through her body. She’d be up and at ‘em in no time.
9. Go go gadget arms. I’m not exactly a tall drink of water and I hate always having to ask my husband to reach stuff for me. Makes me feel needy and I’m not into needy.
10. Some sort of honing device that would let those annoying cell phone salesmen in the mall know that I am under contract and not interested in the bazillion minutes or free text messaging packages that they have to offer. It doesn’t matter how they tout their networks because I’m not willing to pay the big bucks that it would take to get me out of my contract. How hard is that to understand people?! Leave me alone and let me shop in peace for crying out loud.