You Might Be a Redneck If…

May

Posted (Darcie) in Confessions, Guess What!, Holiday Happenings at Home, Things That Make You Go Hmmm

Hello Such the Spot.

No. I’ve not forsaken you.

It may seem that way. But really, I’ve been busy getting things back in order after our super-fly promotion weekend.

The day started out innocently enough.

Really. It did.

See.

girlspromotion1

torrigraduation1

torrigraduationali1

I told you. Completely innocent right?

But sitting through not one, but two promotion ceremonies, and the obligatory reading of names, and long, drawn-out slide shows takes a toll on a gal. Kwim?

So by the time the gang (and by “the gang” oh do I mean the gang) came together for a big celebratory shindig at the house afterwords, we were all ready to cut loose a bit.

I should pause here and explain the gang. The gang, in this case, consisted of my grandmother, my mother, two exes, a set of ex in-laws, our mightaswellbeadopted daughter, and her mom and grandma.

Quite a motley crew, wouldn’t you agree?

Lots of people questioned whether inviting two exes to an event that included a fair amount of alcohol was a good idea.

Oh ye of little faith – it was fine. Fine I tell ya.

Especially after Jeff’s house specialty margaritas began a flowin’.

We all got along swimmingly.

See.

graduationpiggyback

I know the picture quality isn’t great but those of you with a keen eye will recognize that yes, that is my husband, piggybacking my ex around our recently vacuumed grass in the backyard.

It’s really rather unfortunate that I didn’t capture the other memorable events on film.

They included:

-my other ex and my grandmother making their way around the patio table as they rocked the “row your boat” dance moves.
-my ex father-in-law serenading my brother (on one knee, as they held hands btw) with a romantic love song.
-my mom calling my dad (from whom she is recently divorced) at nearly midnight to ask if she had permission to stay out past curfew.
-countless rounds of chocolate cake shots had by all, glasses raised in rambunctious toasts every time.
-our neighbors wondering what the occasion was as they were subject to our rowdy “drink…drink…drink” chant every so often.

And you thought I led an upstanding life. Ha.

In actuality all of the aforementioned instances were part of an uber fun party game that Jeff and I created a couple of years ago. Because it’s sort of reminiscent of truth or dare (and because I had two exes in attendance) I wasn’t sure that the venue was an appropriate one for the playing of our twisted little game.

With truth categories like, “MILF,” “If This Vans a Rockin’,” and “Caught In The Act,” you can understand my hesitation.

Jeff rocked the ultimate husband role though and insisted we give our game a go.

It all worked out in the end.

Honestly.

Even Grams stayed up till the last baby daddy had left the building.

And we unanimously decided to do it again in four years. When Torri graduates high school.

No doubt she’ll seek the solace of her bedroom once again when we pull out the game and she shudders to imagine what her parents’ answers will be to those colorful questions.

Who says I can’t keep it real?

And PS. If you ask really nicely in the comments, I bet we can convince Gram to email me the group shot she took of all of us toasting our third round of shots. Not that you’d want to see such a thing.

Dani on May 28th, 2009 at 1:11 am #

Lmao! It sounds like an awesome time! What are the odds of you sharing the run down of this game? It may come in handy the next time I have to deal with a round up of the exes. Rockin dress btw; what shoes did you end up settling on?

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